What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
