u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
I supernannyed him into submission
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
Randomize
