Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
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