I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
Driving to get a preg test with my ex, wearing my unicorn hat
You are so not ready for motherhood
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
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