i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
Randomize
