Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
Too much dab too little lung dying 😵😵😵
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize