Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
Oh god. There is a bite mark in the bar of soap. Please tell me I was not that wasted.
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
How many fucks given?
0.12846
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
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