we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
My brain says no but my pants say off.
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
So I was at my annual OBGYN appointment and when she saw the bruises on the inside of my thigh she asked if I had been horse back riding...I think my burst of laughter then awkward silence answered the question for me.
Randomize
