The voicemail says i shouldn't bother ever showing my face there again, i don't understand
We visited your boss last night. guess you wont be paying the rent this month, eh?
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
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