Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
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