tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
He called me at 4 a.m. and wanted me to drive him to McDonald's then drop him off at home. It wasn't even a booty call, it was a fucking chauffeur call.
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
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