I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize
