Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
Randomize
