Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
Randomize
