and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
Randomize