There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
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