And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Randomize
