Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
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