I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
Woke up with my face in a bowl of cereal. This is tequila's way of saying fuck you.
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You handed J your Mayan-pocalypse shopping list and told him he wasn't getting laid unless he brought everything on it. Where is he supposed to get a live goat?!
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
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