Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
Why did I wake up this morning with 10 tally marks on my hand and a penis drawn on my tits?
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
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