I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
sorry there isn't a 'perfect ass' emoji
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
Drunk is a universal language darling
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
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