you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
Too bad they don't have an emoji symbol for condoms and 99 cent tacos
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
Just zoned back in to real life and found myself chanting "noodle eater noodle eater noodle eater" at my parrot as he devoured a single macaroni
Randomize
