Porn is love you can see.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
Randomize
