people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
