sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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