is your mom at the bar?
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
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