your thong is hanging out like whoa
Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
I just saw a guy give a mop to his fat wife and say "Look, an exercise stick!"
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
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