i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
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