This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
We are literally scheduling phone sex... if that's not long distance af then i don't know what is
Heeyy... sorry I got so drunk. You probably don't ever want to see me again. Thank you for dealing with me when I tried to jump over the deli counter for some mayonnaise.
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
Randomize
