Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
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