I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
Randomize
