yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
He called me for phone sex. Do you know how hard it is to fake an orgasm, and play Candy Crush at the same time?
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
Randomize
