He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
There's an amish chick decked out in amish clothes on a cell phone staring at me.
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
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