What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
It's sad that I'm more proud of my Twitter account then my resume
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
Randomize