Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
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