she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
I miss vodka workout Fridays
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Randomize
