Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Randomize
