i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
Princesses don't give blow jobs
She texted me and said she was fingering herself. Don't respond to this because she's the perfect girl. I'd love to smell her cell phone after that.
I assume you meant to text someone else on your contact list instead of your own mother...
Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
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