last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
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