We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
I used the phrase "love child of quasimodo and cyclops " in a sentence today.
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
Randomize