Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
As punishment for throwing up on my car, I am holding your phone hostage until the morning. You can read this message after I drop it off.
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
Randomize
