I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
two words: eviction party
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
Dad's drunk, trying to hook me up with a 43yo, and keeps saying one and done. Mom is on the verge of tears and disowning us. You missed a good birthday dinner.
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
Let's say we can see the evolution of our "relation" by his name in my phone. Pizza slice emoticone. Pizza guy. Jordan. Jo. Jackhammer Pizza Guy. Jockhammer pizza guy.
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