On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
Randomize
