Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Randomize
