weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
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