Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
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