You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
I'm eating all of the evidence.
Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize