This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
Randomize
