i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
Randomize
