yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
So I went home with some chick last night... I'm not sue what's worse: not getting a nut at 5am, the condom breaking and not being replaced, feeling poo when I put my finger in her but, sleeping on a heroin mattress in her living room, her swine flu coughing fit at 7am or realizing she peed the matt at 10am. Actually it was probably the fact that she continuously told me she was the classiest girl in boulder.
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
Randomize