I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
Bang-toberfest begins!!
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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